Empathy part 3
When you can see something from someone else's point of view, that's when you truly begin to understand them. And I've said this many times you before--you can't love someone (or something) that you don't understand. Because love doesn't demand its (HIS) own way. And unless you understand where someone's coming from, your natural inclination is to look at them, or their situation, or what have you, through the lens of your own experience. For example: If you've been cheated on, its so easy to assume that everybody is a cheater. If you've been lied to, its that much harder to trust people. And then you extend that past yourself onto everyone else. Because what's inside DOES come out. It has to. So if you've been cheated on, and your friend is telling you about the problems they are having with their significant other... chances are you'll jump to the assumption that your friend is getting cheated on. Because that's what you know. That's your experience. But empathy is taking YOUR experience out of it and seeing things from another point of view. Understanding that just because you went through something doesn't necessarily mean everybody else is going through that same thing. And, look, I get it. We do all go through a lot of the same things. This human existence is very personal, but it is also very universal. 1 Corinthians 10:13, "There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it." And, real quick, "way to escape" means "go out." Or go through it. Bear it. And the best way to bear something... is with a little help from your friends. "Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ" (Galatians 6:2). Which, again, is the whole point. We go through things so we can learn and grow, and so we can help others as they go through those same things. "Common to man" right? We're all just people. For the most part trying to get from the start of the day to the end of the day so we can do it all over again tomorrow. And its not always easy. The hardest part of life is living. But the most important part of life is just showing up. Loving people. Relationships. Connection. Helping yourself BY helping others. Loving God BY loving others. Bearing each other's burdens and in that way helping each other get through what we're all going through. But do you know what sabotages that every time? Judging people with anything except righteous judgment. And righteous judgment is executing the judgment that God passed down to Jesus on the cross. Not killing Him, but bringing Him back to life. Not kicking people when they're down, but pulling them up. Understanding that we've all been there, or will be there, and probably will be there again. So instead of pointing out what's wrong with people, we ought to build them up by telling them the truth--tell them what's RIGHT with them. RIGHTeous judgment. Mercy. Forgiveness. Grace. Understanding. Empathy. "Man, you really messed up." They already know they messed up. So maybe, "What can I do to help?" Maybe understand WHY they messed up and then you'll be able to really help instead of just making things worse. Seek first to understand, then to help!