Expectations part 2
The more I think about it--and you might have noticed that I think about this subject quite a bit--the more I wonder why we think people should live up to OUR expectations in the first place. Like, just because something's right for ME doesn't mean its right for everybody (or anybody) else. There is no box that we're all supposed to fit in, no matter what religion might try to make you believe. And, for the record, depending on the year and the culture that magic box sure does change shape a lot, doesn't it? Let me say it like this, "Why are you trying to fit in when you were born to stand out?" And why do you think its ok to try to make other people fit in to your idea of how things are supposed to be? And, of course, there are some exceptions to this. Logan, for example, needs to fit in to my way of thinking--to a point--because I'm his father. I'm responsible for him. But even still, I endeavor to let Logan be Logan. Because I love HIM, and not the idea of what I think he should be. That kid does some things that I cannot understand. Because even though he IS mini-me... he's still an actual person. And people do what they want... unless there's a very compelling reason not to. Logan obeys the rules (whether he wants to or not) because he doesn't want to lose his iPad privileges. He understands the expectations that I have on him as a son. But, like I said, that's different because I'm responsible for him. When it comes to just about anybody and everybody else in the world... its not my place to tell them what to do or who to be. There aren't--or I should there there shouldn't be--Spiritual policemen all over the place. Especially when you consider that it seems like people are always on a sin hunt. Looking for what's wrong with people. Looking to make themselves bigger by making others feel smaller. But that's more imposing your will on someone than placing expectations on them. Both or messed up, but one thing at a time, right? I'm trying to say that we need to live and let live. People aren't always going to agree with you, and that's ok. Even if you're "right" and they're "wrong." Because from their point of view YOU'RE "wrong" and they're right. So instead of ruining relationships because of disagreements what I think we ought to do is just love people no matter what. Love without expectations. Because you might love someone as hard as you can... and they'll still reject it, and you. It happens. Not everybody is ready for what you bring to the table. I say this all the time, I know I'm not for everybody. And that's ok. Get in where you fit in. Don't expect people to react to you in a certain way, and you won't be disappointed when they don't. Love them anyway, but don't do it for the reaction. Do it because its in your heart to do it. And--I think I'm going to get into this aspect tomorrow--when you don't have expectations, you are pleasantly surprised more often than bitterly let down. What's that old saying? "Hope for the best, but plan for the worst." If you're not expecting anything, you can just take things as they come. You can stop trying to manipulate and control people, and you can just let it be what it is. Things aren't always (or ever) going to be what you want them to. But you can still find joy no matter what. No matter where. No matter who. You just have to change your mindset. You find what you're looking for, most of the time. So look for the love!