First part 3
In order to "be" first we have to put others first. That's the Divine Order of the Kingdom of God--the Kingdom of love. Look at Philippians 2:3 (NLT), "Don't be selfish; don't try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself." And, listen, being humble doesn't mean thinking less of yourself. It simply means thinking of yourself less. Not focusing on yourself (selfish), but focusing on others (selfless). Now let me say this: You shouldn't neglect yourself. Self-care is vitally important. It's like when you're on an airplane and they tell you "If something happens put your own oxygen mask on before you try to help anybody else." Because you can't do anything at all if you're passed out on the floor. What we're talking about here is not trying to exalt ourselves. Not trying to impress people or make ourselves look good. What we're talking about is sacrificing ourselves for others. Jesus taught that the greatest love a man can have is to lay his life down for his friends. When they asked John the Baptist, "What should we do?" "John replied, "If you have two shirts, give one to the poor. If you have food, share it with those who are hungry"" (Luke 3:11 NLT). Notice--if you have TWO shirts. Notice--SHARE your food. You don't have to starve yourself, or freeze to death because you don't have any clothes left. You are called to live out of your abundance. To see a need, and if at all possible meet that need. Put others first. Give what you've got. Let what's inside come out by knowing and believing it's in there. Fill yourself to overflowing with what God has filled you with. What I'm trying to say is--you don't have to literally kill yourself to lay your life down. You can simply esteem others higher than yourself. Think about other people. Put them first. I've said it before and I'll say it again--you don't need a saw to give someone a hand. You don't have to wreck yourself to help someone else. Boundaries are healthy and important. Do what you can do. Stretch yourself out. But know your limits. Know when to say when. If you give something (or someone) everything you've got... that's either enough, or it isn't. And either way, you've literally done all you can do. How can you give more than everything you've got? You can't. So stop killing yourself. And you've probably heard the saying, "Don't cross oceans for people who wouldn't cross a puddle for you." I disagree. Cross the ocean. Love as big and as hard as you can. But let that be enough. Don't drown yourself in the ocean. If someone isn't picking up what you're laying down... stop banging your head against the wall. Shrug your shoulders and move on. Turning the other cheek is not about standing there and letting somone slap you over and over and over again. It's about not retaliating. Loving someone no matter what, even if it's from a distance. And I know this seems like a tricky balance. But I truly believe--give it all you've got, and let that be enough... or not. If you give it all you've got, you can have a clear conscience either way. If it works out... great. If it doesn't... at least you tried. You did what you could do. So put others first. Yes. Give what you've got. Always. But let that be enough. Know when to say when. Give what you've got. But know your limits. Know that it's ok to say "no." It's ok to have boundaries. It's ok to love people without literally killing yourself.