Friendship part 3
The point I was trying to get to yesterday, in my "wander around I hope I found my point somewhere along the way" way, is that I don't think you can love someone without BEING fond of them. Which is not to say you should only love the people you're fond of. Exactly the opposite. The more you love someone the more fond of them you become. Because while its popular to say, "love is blind" (and I really do understand the saying. There's a time and place in a relationship where you don't see the other person's flaws because of how into them you are.) but the truth of the matter is that love--true, agape, God-love--isn't blind. It (HE) sees clearly. Because it (HE) doesn't look at the outside. It (HE) looks at the heart. And not just "the" heart, but HIS heart. God sees what's underneath the surface. What's hidden deep inside. And deep inside we all just want to be loved. That's why, at the most very basic level, we do what we do. We think if we do it it will get us closer to being loved. Unfortunately, that's the trap that religion has set. That's the lie that the serpent hissed into Eve's ear. Because the truth of the matter is, love is not about what we DO. Its about who we ARE. Its about who GOD is. And God IS love. The heavenly Father loves His Son (us, Jesus, God in the flesh, love in a body) because that's His nature. That's not just what God does. That's WHO God IS. And when we know (and believe) that love, that's who WE are. But, again, my point for this Rant series is friendship. Fondness. And I'm convinced that you can't give someone everything you have and everything you are--which is what it means to love them--without also BECOMING fond of them. Romans 5:7-8 says, "For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dar to die. But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." In the Message Bible it reads, "We can understand someone dying for a person worth dying for, and we can understand how someone good and noble could inspire us to selfless sacrifice. But God put his love on the line for us by offering his Son in sacrificial death while we were of no use whatever to him." See, Jesus died for us not because of what He could GET, but because of what He had to GIVE. What we needed. Needed, and couldn't earn. No matter how much we tried. No matter how loveable we tried to be. Because its not about that. Love isn't about someone being "worth" dying for because of what they've done. Love is the statement that you ARE worth dying for no matter what. That's the greatest love a man can have; to lay his life down for his friends. That's the biggest gift you can give. I'll say that again for emphasis: That's the biggest GIFT you can give. And gifts are freely given. They are not earned. Deserve's got nothing to do with it. Now watch this: When you give someone a gift, and their face lights up with joy... its hard not to FEEL that joy. Its something that becomes even more real when its shared. When you go through something with someone you form a bond. And when you give someone something that they desperately need (no matter how they respond or react) it, at the very least, plants the seeds of friendship. You can't love without giving, and you can't love without feeling a sense of fondness.