Relationship part 4
What if we were honestly, truly, more interested in giving than getting? Think about how much better that would make our relationships. Because that would pretty much do away with expectations. And I believe expectations are the best way in the world to set yourself up for disappointment. Relationships are between people, right? And here's a secret about people: People do what THEY want. My grandfather always says, "You can do whatever you want, as long as you're willing to face the consequences." But the truth is, many times we don't even think about the consequences. We just do whatever flies into our heads. So if you're going to do what you want to do... and I want (or expect) you to do something else... see what I'm saying? Setup for disappointment. And the thing you end up doing might not even be "wrong" per se. But if its different than what I want (to get) then I won't necessarily be happy about it. What I'm trying to say, in my wander around and hope I make my point kind of way, is that love is giving. Not getting. My personal definition of love is, "I will gladly spend myself and all I have for you, even though it seems that the more I love you, the less you love me" (2 Corinthians 12:15 NLT). Giving everything you have and everything you are without worrying about what comes next. You can't control how someone reacts to what you do. You can't MAKE someone receive your love. All you can do is give what you've got. Give it all. Maximum effort. And if your whole deal is giving... because you know and believe that you have something WORTH giving... then you won't care about getting. You don't give in order to receive. You give because you've already received. We love because He first loved us. God filled us up with His love--with Himself--so that we could receive and release that love. So that what's inside could come out. Because what's inside WILL come out. Whatever it is. Or, rather, whatever you believe it is. Because what you believe is inside is too big to stay inside. And, when you think about it, that's why relationships are so important. Its important to let what's inside come out. And you can't give what you've got unless you've got someone to give it to. Right? That's one of the reasons why its not good for man to be alone. We can't do everything ourselves. We need each other. And we can't truly express ourselves without someone to express ourselves TO. Remember yesterday when I was talking about finding someone who loves you for no reason and then showering them with reasons? Well, that's the best kind of relationship. Where you're giving--not to get, but simply because its in your heart to give. Simply because you HAVE something to give. Giving because you want them to have what you've got. Experience it. Enjoy it. And the best way to do that is to share it. Experience it... together. That's what relationship is, bottom line (or top line, as Logan likes to say); its sharing experiences. Sharing your life. Sharing your love. So if you want a relationship to work... give it all you've got. Don't worry about getting. You already have what you need. Let what's inside come out. By filling yourself to overflowing with what you've already been filled with. By knowing and believing that the God who is love lives inside you, and is bursting at the seams to get out!