Value part 3
When you understand the value of YOUR actions--giving, not trying to get--then it becomes much easier to understand the value of OTHER people's actions. And, in short, unless you know and believe the love of Christ... unless you know that you are loved... your actions are going to be all about GETTING love. Which is why we so often look for love in all the wrong places. And why we so often accept anything that comes our way, figuring "something must be better than nothing." The worst part though, is when we feel like we can't get what we want so we act out in order to get SOMETHING. I think people yell because they want to be heard. I think we've accepted the idea that negative attention is better than being ignored. I think we're in a place where we don't think we deserve anything good, so we'll take what we can get. Because nobody hates their own flesh. So self-destructive behavior has to have something behind it. Some value. There has to be something we're getting out of it--or at the very least something we HOPE to get out of it--otherwise we wouldn't do it. So when we are confronted with this behavior we need to take a minute to let empathy into the equation. "That guy did blah blah blah to me!" Ok, but it probably wasn't about YOU at all. I think a lot of the time rather than someone being AGAINST you they are really just FOR themselves. And you happened to be in the area. This is where Jesus' teaching about turning the other cheek really hits home. Because if you take something personally and try to give an eye for an eye... well... everybody will end up blind. Like Logan always says, "When friends fight... nobody wins." So instead of giving back what someone gives you, listen to what their behavior is saying. Because hurting people hurt people. And if you know somebody is hurting... you can help them. You can break the cycle by NOT just giving back what they gave you. You can give them what YOU'VE got. Which, again, is the unconditional love of God. You can obey the New Commandment and love others as Jesus loves you. Show them a more excellent way. Which is Jesus. Which is love. And when someone is confronted with the very thing they desire (love), especially in the face of them giving you something LESS than love, that's how you heap burning coals on their head. Not in order to punish them, or hurt them, but in order to melt their hearts. In order to consume all of that other stuff and leave only love. Here's my caution to you though: When you go that gentle route of being vunerable and opening your heart in the face of something less desirable... you might not get the result YOU are looking for. Especially in the heat of the moment, it might not be a "Saul getting knocked off his donkey and blinded by the light" moment. It might seem like you come out on the short end of the stick. Getting hurt by someone (who is hurting) and not retaliating... by letting someone else have the last word... that can be really hard. But it's better to have the RIGHT Word (Jesus, love) than the last word. It's better to leave them thinking about the love you gave them. It's better to show love in the face of, well, everything really. Because love is the most valuable thing in the universe. And it's value comes when it give it away. No matter what. To no matter whom. Why? Because you are loved, and because you are love!